What Happens When Everything Goes Wrong During Your Move Abroad?
- Emily Jett
- Jan 26
- 3 min read
The Side of Moving Abroad Nobody Posts Online
When people imagine moving abroad, they picture:
Smooth airport arrivals
Cute cafés while apartment hunting
Instant peace, confidence, and freedom
What they don’t picture is standing in a foreign country thinking:
“Did I just make the biggest mistake of my life?”
Because when everything goes wrong during an international move, it can feel like your dream is unraveling in real time.
Here’s what actually happens in those moments — emotionally, financially, and logistically — and why struggling at the beginning doesn’t mean you failed.
When the Paperwork Starts Falling Apart
For many expats, the first domino to fall is bureaucracy.
You might run into:
Visa processing delays
Residency appointments booked months out
Missing or incorrectly translated documents
Name mismatches across official forms
Suddenly you can’t:
Open a bank account
Sign a lease
Get a local phone plan
This stage feels especially scary because your independence disappears overnight. You go from being a fully capable adult to someone who can’t complete basic tasks without help.
This isn’t incompetence — it’s navigating an unfamiliar legal system. It’s frustrating, exhausting, and completely normal during relocation.
When the Financial Stress Hits
The beginning of a move abroad is often the most expensive phase — and people rarely talk about it openly.
Unexpected costs can include:
Staying in temporary housing longer than planned
Rental car fees while figuring out transportation
Security deposits for housing and utilities
International transaction fees
Replacing items you couldn’t bring
Even a solid savings cushion can start to feel thin.
This is usually when panic thoughts creep in:
“Should I go home?”
“Did I underestimate everything?”
“What if I can’t make this work?”
The key thing to remember: this stage is financially front-loaded. It’s the most unstable part of the move — not your permanent reality.
When Housing Doesn’t Work Out
Housing problems hit harder than most other relocation issues.
Maybe:
The apartment looked bigger in photos
The neighborhood feels wrong
Your Airbnb cancels last minute
When your living situation feels unstable, everything else feels unstable too. This often triggers emotional spirals like:
“I hate it here.”
“I made a mistake.”
“I want my old life back.”
But what you usually miss isn’t your old country — it’s the feeling of comfort and competence you had there. Those feelings take time to rebuild in a new environment.
The Emotional Crash Nobody Warns You About
Even if the move was your dream, you can still feel:
Lonely
Irritable
Overwhelmed
Emotionally drained
You’re grieving:
Familiar routines
Close relationships
The ease of knowing how everything works
Excitement and grief can exist at the same time. Add logistical problems on top of that, and it becomes emotionally heavy fast.
This phase is a mix of culture shock and transition fatigue, and nearly everyone who stays abroad long-term experiences it.
The people who succeed aren’t the ones who never struggle — they’re the ones who don’t interpret struggle as failure.
What People Who Make It Through Do Differently
When everything goes wrong, successful long-term expats shift into problem-solving mode.
They:
Focus on One Day at a Time
Instead of trying to fix their whole life at once, they ask, "What's the one thing I can handle today?”
Lower Expectations (Temporarily)
The beginning isn’t the glow-up phase. It’s the logistics bootcamp phase.
Ask for Help Sooner
From expat groups, local communities, and professionals. Trying to do everything alone makes the process much harder.
Stop Comparing Their Beginning to Someone Else’s Middle
Your Day 10 abroad should not be compared to someone’s Year 5.
The Turning Point Most People Don’t See Coming
One day, without realizing exactly when it happened:
You understand the transportation system
You receive your residency card
You find a grocery store you like
You make your first local connection
You’re no longer just surviving — you’re building a life.
The chaotic beginning doesn’t last forever, but it does change you. You become more adaptable, more resourceful, and more confident than you were before you left.
Struggling at the Beginning Doesn’t Mean You Failed
If your move abroad feels like it’s falling apart right now, you’re not alone — and you’re not behind.
You’re in the hardest chapter: the transition phase nobody films or talks about enough.
Many people who now love their life abroad almost quit in the beginning. The difference is they gave themselves time to get through the storm.
And one day, you might be the one telling someone else:
“The start was brutal… but I’m so glad I didn’t give up.”
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